We all have days when we feel lucky to be alive. Whether you’ve had a wonderful day out with the family or the sun is shining, and you’re watching the waves crash against the cliffs, we all experience moments when it seems like life is perfect. Sadly, on the flipside, there are days that don’t go to plan, and life can present us with challenges, usually when we least expect them. The key to coping is learning to make lemonade when life throws you lemons. It may not be easy, but humans are resilient and adaptable creatures, so be confident that you can pull through when times get tough. If you’ve found life difficult of late, here is a guide to help you cope.
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Surviving stressful life events
You’re trying to plan a wedding, you’re going through a breakup, you can’t afford to pay the bills, you’re desperate to sell your house, you’ve lost someone special to you. These are all events that we can find stressful. Sometimes, there’s a positive reason, and it’s worthwhile going through all the hassle to emerge the other side victorious. In other cases, it can feel like you’re swimming against the tide without any shining light to guide you. Planning a wedding and buying a house can be stressful, but they bring the promise of many happy times ahead. In contrast, going through relationship troubles, losing your job or trying to come to terms with bereavement can make you feel that there’s no way out. Trying to cope when it seems like the world is against you may seem impossible, but it can be done.
Coping with relationship breakdown
Relationships have such a powerful impact on the people we are and the lives we lead. Positive, healthy relationships can do us a power of good and bring us unbridled joy, but unhealthy relationships can make our lives a misery. Going through a breakup can seem like the worst thing in the world at the time, and it can take weeks, months or even years to recover. If you’re having difficulties in your relationship, try and talk openly and honestly about the problems you’re experiencing, and if you both want to, work out how you can find solutions. Maybe you’d benefit from spending more time with each other and making more of an effort to make the other person feel valued and loved. Perhaps there are issues that may be best addressed in couple’s therapy sessions, or you might find it useful to take a break.
Sometimes, people decide that relationships are worth fighting for, but this is not always the best option. You may be exhausted and tired of giving your partner second chances, or you may want more from life. If you’re not happy, it may be best to go your separate ways and seek advice from divorce lawyers. Nobody enters into marriage thinking that they won’t get their happy ending, but sometimes, things don’t work out how you expected. You can grow apart, people can change, and suddenly something that made you incredibly happy no longer has the same effect. If you are going through a breakup, take your time to process what has happened and give yourself time to grieve and heal. Lean on close friends and family, and try not to bottle up your emotions and feelings.
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Bouncing back after losing your job
Many of us go to work every morning without really giving the prospect of unemployment a second thought. If you suddenly find yourself out of work, it can be a very daunting and scary situation. The main problem for most people is money, but there’s also the issue of pride and feeling like you’re not using your time constructively. When you have a job, there’s a reason for you to get up early, and you have a sense of purpose. When you’re unemployed, it can be hard to find the motivation to use your time in a useful way and to fill the hours you would normally spend at work. If you have lost your job, and you’re desperate to find work, check your resume is up to date, and start looking for vacancies that are suitable. In the short-term, it may be best to sign up with a recruitment agency and look for temporary roles while you try and find something more permanent. Upload your resume onto job sites, and work through application forms carefully. Pay attention to the job description when you’re answering questions.
If you find it difficult to fill the void left by losing your job, consider volunteering. You may only be out of work for a few weeks, and this is a really useful and satisfying way to spend your time. It may also lead to opportunities for paid work.
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There’s nothing in life more distressing or upsetting than bereavement. Losing somebody you love can turn your life upside down and change you in ways you never thought possible. Missing somebody can feel like a physical pain, and there may be times when you wonder if you’ll ever be happy or feel ‘normal’ again. If you have lost somebody, don’t give yourself a time frame to recover. Time can be a great healer, so don’t rush back to work or put pressure on yourself to start being sociable again. Take every day as it comes, and try and manage your emotions. Many people find that it’s good to talk, but it can often be tough to confide in people you know. You may find it easier to open up to somebody you don’t know, for example, a therapist or a counselor.
Remember that crying and getting upset are not signs of weakness, and they are natural human responses. If you hear a song or you visit a place that brings memories flooding back, there’s nothing wrong with bursting into tears. It’s much better to let things out rather than let them build up inside you.
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Sometimes, it can seem like nothing could ever bring you down, but life has a habit of throwing us curveballs. If you’ve had a tough time of late, and you’re struggling to cope, bear these tips in mind. Don’t hesitate to ask for help, don’t be afraid to show your emotions, and surround yourself with people who are there to support and guide you. It can seem like there’s no light at the end of the tunnel, but with time, things will get better, and you will feel happier, stronger, and more confident.